TEE PEE/LOO ROLL
Gave a speech on toilet paper for first period Debate. Over > Under. It was 1-2 min, and I think I did pretty good considering it was extemporaneous/impromptu hybrid. I wrote my points during morning announcements. God extra credit for volunteering. It went something like this. Anecdote/attention catcher thing: Have you ever witnessed a three-year-old, trying to grasp with his clumsy little hand for the next available toilet tissue sheet on an under-hung roll? It's not pretty. Thesis: Toilet paper hung over is better than toilet paper hung under. Main points: (1) It looks better, (2) it's more sanitary, less messier, and (3) it's easier to get to. #1 If you have a pretty design on your toilet paper, it only shows on an over-hung roll. If it was under-hung, the design would be upside down, inside out. Hotels do that fancy little triangle with the first sheet. This only works when the roll is hung over. #2 Your hand is dirty. By trying to get to the toilet paper, you smear your poop on the wall. (Under) The toilet paper touches the wall, where someone else might have smeared their poop. You could catch a disease, especially in public toilets. (Also under) I'm not only talking about poop. Should wet fingernail polish touch the wall, you'd have to redo both your nails AND the wall. (Still under) #3 People in only the beginning stages of arthritis could damage their hand even further by twisting their wrist and fingers the wrong way on an under-hung roll. Static makes the sheet cling to the wall when hung under. It's right there in plain view, so you don't have to feel around or twist your neck looking for the end sheet. (Over) Disclaimer: I'm not saying there's a CORRECT way to hang toilet paper, but hanging it over is the BETTER way. Thank you. (Applause) It was a controversial topic, which made it perfect. |
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